Jump. And Jump Again.

I told a few friends that I decided to start writing and was met with a lot of “I’m not surprised” or “That’s so cool!” Truth be told, writing doesn’t come naturally to me. I’m much rather take a picture or speak out whatever I am trying to describe. Well, if you don’t enjoy writing, why’d you start a blog?
Great question, I’m glad you asked it. A couple of years ago – I think it was New Years 2015 – I decided that: a) New Year’s resolutions were silly and b) I was going to start a New Year’s word or phrase.
Pushing yourself to grow is great. Challenging yourself to try something new is fantastic. But, often we end up forgetting or “breaking” our resolution by mid-February and throwing the baby out with the bath water. It can feel frustrating, saddening, embarrassing, among other things.
NYE 2014 I decided that I was going to live by a phrase throughout 2015: just jump. 
We have all heard the quotes about building your wings as you’re falling or that a leap of faith isn’t from point A to point B, it’s just a jump from point A. Do we really hear them though? Do we believe them? Do we feel comfortable living them? Well, I decided I was going to find out in 2015. I was willing to try anything that scared me or made me feel uncomfortable.
A lot can happen in a year…and I’m sure that a lot did happen that year. But, the one thing that propelled my “just jump” was literally jumping. Well, part of it was jumping…part of it was being pushed.
Spring 2015 I decided that I was going to buy a Groupon to go skydiving. For the most part, I don’t like heights and I don’t like roller coasters. But I love airplanes and love looking out of skyscrapers. Essentially, going skydiving was pushing all of my boundaries. The nice thing about Groupon is that you have a year to redeem the experience. Great, I thought. I’ll buy it now and warm myself up to the idea so by next spring I’ll be ready to go. And then I put the thought out of my mind for a while.
What I didn’t take into consideration was that I work with many adventurous people. That summer, one of my coworkers who was based out of the Hong Kong office was working from our Herndon, Va. office for three months. As summer was coming to an end and as we were all reflecting on the seasons changing, skydiving came up in conversation. Suddenly, my coworker perked up, “I want to go skydiving!” Not sure if she was serious or not, I asked a couple of times (the answer remained yes) and then said I would send her the Groupon link. She was serious. She bought the Groupon.
Talk about shit getting real. My lovely fantasy timeline of having a year to mentally prepare to skydive got a rude awakening. She was going back to Hong Kong within the next two weeks and wouldn’t be coming back to Virginia for a few years. We had to redeem our experience…now. Labor Day Weekend was a couple days away and we knew it would probably be a day-long affair so we booked our slot for one of the days that weekend.
Jump day came and we (my coworker, my mom, and I) made the hour-long drive to the skydiving center in Warrenton, Va. Thankfully the sky was blue, sun was shining, and there wasn’t a cloud in sight. (We only had one chance to go skydiving since my coworker was going to be leaving soon after.) As we got further from DC and closer to Warrenton, the nerves started to set in. What am I doing?! Am I crazy?! I’m too young to die! My coworker was unusually calm, and I was a little concerned.
Adrenaline took over. We checked in, were assigned to a group, and then were told there were four or five groups ahead of us. That meant we had the joy of watching about two dozen people fall out of the sky. What a great way to calm the nerves… Thankfully my sociable mom was talking to different jumpers and family members which was a nice distraction for my coworker (she was nervous by this point) and I.
And then it was our turn. We were taught how to tuck our legs for the fall out of the plane and how to extend our legs for the landing. Into the harnesses we went. Straps checked. Parachutes checked. One by one we piled into the tiny plane. Instructor, jumper, instructor, jumper. Door closed and plane made it was to the runway. And then we were in the air and the entire cabin was filled with excitement. About 30 seconds (or, at least it felt like 30 seconds) later, one of the instructors near the front of the cabin opened the door and I turned around in panic to ask my instructor if we were already jumping. “No, that’s just to get the air flowing” Phew, okay. And as I turned around to face the front of the plane, I saw the first jumper falling out the plane with the instructor on their back. And then the next. And then my instructor and I were suddenly waddling towards the door and the edge of the plane.
It was truly something out of a movie – I didn’t have any time to process what was happening and then he was suddenly counting down 3….2….1…and we were falling out of the plane. My brain couldn’t, and still can’t, process the fall (maybe 45 seconds?). It felt like a very strong wind tunnel and all I could see were different colored squares in the distant (what you see what you’re high up in an airplane and looking at the world beneath). And then my instructor deployed the parachute and we were floating and chatting our way through the sky. It was simply incredible. We landed (there’s a video somewhere of me yelling ‘aaaaaahhhhhhh’ as I’m landing) and it felt like such a big accomplishment. Whatever fears I had about skydiving prior to doing so were completely gone.
That entire experience reinforced every quote about jumping and creating wings, about not needing to know the end point, and about trusting yourself. Which has led me to this blog. Sometimes writing feels scary. Not knowing where I’ll take this blog feels uncomfortable. Not knowing if anyone will be interested in what I write is definitely scary. At the end of the day, none of that really matters.
The just jump philosophy has given me so many amazing experiences (you’ll have to wait to hear about those!) and with each of those experiences I am reminded that the scariest part is jumping. Each and every time I jump, there is growth in the free-fall and then the nets and wings are created and appear when they’re needed.
So, what are you waiting for? Just jump.